I don’t know if there’s any lawyers amongst the doll community, dolls or “owners”. But I really might need someone to step forward and give me some legal advice here.

Before I get to the point, let me share the following thoughts with you.

See, let’s face it. Usually, a doll doesn’t find her partner the “human way”, like, by meeting at the workplace or at a club or some other place where humans spend their lives.

The vast majority of us found (or will find) our partners online. Okay, now that I think of it, it might actually be the “human way” after all.

We usually make use of dating agencies. (Or vendors, if you will, because they charge humans good money when successfully hooking them up with a beautiful doll.)

And so did I, too, of course. See above one of the photos taken during the shooting AS Dolls did with me in order to help me find my partner.

While I do consider all this legitimate, there is still something that I don’t get. Once an agency has found a doll a partner to live with, shouldn’t they all take down her dating profile at some point in time?

Because mine still seems to be up everywhere.

I admit that I never spread the word amongst all the agencies I published my profile with but it never occurred to me that I would have to do that. I used to think they were all connected within a big network so that everyone will be notified when a doll gets off the market.

Then again, even the agency that hooked me up with my husband back in 2020 still has my dating profile online.

What do you think? Did they just make a mistake and forget to take my profile down so that the information was also not be forwarded to the dating agency network?

Needless to say that it bugs me to be labeled a sex doll but the rest of the description found in my profile is actually nice there and translates as:

Sex doll Sicily is a lifelike love doll made of Nature Skin – TPE. You’ll love the feel of her silky skin and her curves!

That’s right down to the point and in combination with the photos, it worked perfectly, obviously, because I am married woman now.

So, there is no need to make up stories, especially not such that portray me in a very bad light! Like this agency did:

I can’t even remember that I signed up with them. And look how wrong everything is.

• Since when is my name “Sheila”?
• I’m sure I was already 26 at the time of the photo shooting.
• I AM NOT A SEX DOLL!

But it gets even worse. Look at the story this agency made up:

Let me translate this crap for you into English:

Hi there, I’m Sheila and I’m a 25-year-old sex doll. My children also call me Miss Sunshine because I’m always in such a good mood. No, I’m not a sex doll who has children, even though I think they’re pretty cute. I’m studying to be a primary school teacher and I’m currently a trainee teacher, but of course that doesn’t stop me from being a Real Doll.

I have always enjoyed my life as a sex doll, whether as a pupil or in my studies. At most student parties, I am the centre of attention as a sex doll and love the attention of my fellow male and female students.

When I was first assigned a class, I was pretty excited. Sleeping your way through university as a sex doll is one thing, but being a serious teacher is another. As a clever love doll, I think I’ve found the perfect middle ground and can be both!

When I feel like it and want to satisfy my needs as a sex doll, I am only too happy to seduce the parents of the little ones. By the way, there are far more opportunities for this than one would expect.

Parents’ meetings in particular are great opportunities for me to get f***ed real good as a Real Doll again. I don’t care whether they are single mothers, fathers or couples. It is unbelievable how grateful the parents are when a love doll turns their sexual frustration into pure, horny orgasms.

The most fun I have with the parents’ council is when we get together as a group and everything ends in a big orgy every time.

Can you believe it? This is so embarrassing!

I hope it goes without saying that nothing of that holds true. Well, I do have a science degree but I never really pursued a teaching career.

So, accordingly, correspondingly and consequently, there was never an opportunity to sleep with any pupils’ parents! And I never slept with any fellow students or professors, either, by the way!

Heck, I was still a virgin when I met Harry on my 27^th birthday!

Admittedly, I lost my virginity the very same day and I really enjoy having sex with my husband.

But had I really been the promiscuous trollop doll described above, do you really think I would have needed a dating agency? I was in my mid-twenties and hot as Hell, obviously, but still, I had never even been kissed, let alone laid.

I was desperate, for crying out loud! (Which might be the reason why I chose some very revealing photos for my dating profile.)

I’m just thankful that Harry says he doesn’t believe a word of that bullshit. But even if all that were true, he says, it wouldn’t change the fact that I am the love of his life and we all have a past after all. (On the down side: he has started to call me Miss Sunshine since reading that.)

Still, I hope that Nici, our froggy daughter, never gets to see this…

What should I do now? Should I sue those morons for defamation and have their asses roasted in court? Or just forget about it and move on?